Monday, September 2, 2013

I Call Myself a Warrior :)

If this is the first time you've stopped by, welcome. Originally, this blog was started to chronicle all the lessons I've learned in gratitude. But since my son, Jace's, diagnosis of leukemia in January 2013, I haven't had any time to actually blog about much of anything else and spend most of my time blogging here, posting here, or capturing our life here

You can go back and read posts about isolation, an amazing night out with New Kids on the Block, and my best birthday EVA! You can go back even further and find out more about why I started On the Wings of Gratitude and why I want to, eventually, write a book about how to be grateful no matter which struggles come your way (death, adoption, divorce, addiction, cancer). 

I've always been pretty open about my life experiences, but the spotlight that cancer put us in just about tops them all. We now have a platform to speak from and are more than passionate about how cancer affects and changes families just like us. 

We've decided to use this space for the month of September to spotlight some of the awesome and heroic families and kids we've met along this journey. 

As you may know September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month and we vow to remind everyone we meet  that even though it's difficult for them to process, cancer doesn't discriminate young, old, rich, poor, big, little. We don't just want you to be aware that it's happening. We want you to be aware how it's changing people, families and lives. We want you to care enough to not look away. 

So, get your heart ready to meet some of the world's biggest heroes! 

Tonight, I thought I'd give a little humor insight into our lives. This story isn't typically something I'd share on our caring bridge site and so I thought it would be best to share here. 

Thursday started off good enough. The kids got off to school and Jace woke up feeling good. He took his medicines without much of a fight and, eventually, started eating like a champ. Hummus was his food of choice. With a spoon. 

I had a meeting I had to be at that morning and so our sweet friend, Jen, stayed with Jace for a few minutes and played trains. (Note: If you want Jace to be your BFF, just play trains or cars with him and you'll have his heart for life.) 

After the meeting, I tried my best to get him to rest, but because he is Super Jace (he says "That's why I'm Super Jace!") he wanted to run around and wrestle. Yes, even after having chemo the day before. 

The time came when we had to load up and drive the short distance to pick up his big sister. Normally, this distance wouldn't be a big deal. It's truly not THAT far, but add in "soccer mom" traffic, construction that goes for miles, and a detour to just get to the school and it's a recipe for a disaster. 

About 5 minutes into our journey, Jace says "My stomach hurts BAD!" and tears followed. 

Great. Do I turn around? Do I keep going? This so wasn't in my plan. 

I kept going. I soon found myself in the car pick up line with my seat belt off, holding my sweet boy who was still crying, and trying to juggle the throw up bucket (aka a cut up milk jug) all while trying to maneuver the car around the pick up trail. 

Finally, we were through the line and parked so we could regroup for the next 1/2 of the trip home. Jace is still saying his stomach hurts and his sister is doing everything possible to soothe him as we bump along the road. 

Just when I think we are in the clear, we drive up into the garage and get  out. 


Yep. We made it, but not without the throw up bucket getting used. :) 

Everyone needed some baths, new changes of clothes and some time to rest. Thankfully, oldest sister got a ride home from her dance practice. 

Soon, I found myself on the phone for several hours trying to sort some small "dramas" out. In the middle of all of that, I learned hubby would be working until midnight and before I knew it, it was already 10 pm! 

Finally, everyone was in bed and I was exhausted. Definitely harder than a full day at work. As I took a moment to finally breathe, I saw a small shadow beside me and then heard a tiny voice say: 

"Mom, I'm hungry." 

Yep. I forgot to feed the kids DINNER. 


This is just a reminder out there to all of you that trick yourself into thinking I have it altogether. 

Days later, I can tell you that even in the moments of that day and the large amounts of stress I felt coming at me in all directions, the bigger picture was that we all make mistakes, we all have a lot going on, no one is perfect, we all are doing the best we can, and tomorrow is another day! 

As moms, it's easy to fall into the traps of lies we tell ourselves or into the "mom competition" that is written in invisible ink. 

We need to remember this: 

The most important things in life are the moments we get to spend with those we love no matter what obstacles come our way throughout the day. 

In Gratitude,

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